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this isn't a real entry

but i don't have to come up with a real entry because i have a new computer! i ordered a lenovo ideapad y580 a tthe beginning of last month, and after the shipping got pushed back once, it finally came on friday. since i'm scheduled until 5 during the work week, i couldn't pick it up until monday morning.

now i can finally game again (where are my priorities?) and get this silly acer out of my house.

i've been meaning to come here since june

i started school again in october and while i'm not hating it as much as i used to, i still don't want to be there. i'm never gonna be thrilled to go. my lab last semester was classical european and i felt rusty and slow and horrible. i'm always a little nervous about being in the kitchens, but i could knock everything out in good time.
now, here i was plating alot of things late and being the last person in the room to plate their final dish. i kept forgetting things on the way to the ingredients, re-reading recipes constantly, then getting overwhelmed and freezing up.
dumb things like that keep me terrified about doing competitions and working in a restaurant. my brain feels like a stranger, and i really need this to stop happening because there's too much to be done and too much stuff that needs to be shoved and retained in there.

it's got to be more than add and drug side effects.

Mississippi Personhood Amendment

Originally posted by gabrielleabelle at Mississippi Personhood Amendment
Okay, so I don't usually do this, but this is an issue near and dear to me and this is getting very little no attention in the mainstream media.

Mississippi is voting on November 8th on whether to pass Amendment 26, the "Personhood Amendment". This amendment would grant fertilized eggs and fetuses personhood status.

Putting aside the contentious issue of abortion, this would effectively outlaw birth control and criminalize women who have miscarriages. This is not a good thing.

Jackson Women's Health Organization is the only place women can get abortions in the entire state, and they are trying to launch a grassroots movement against this amendment. This doesn't just apply to Mississippi, though, as Personhood USA, the group that introduced this amendment, is trying to introduce identical amendments in all 50 states.

What's more, in Mississippi, this amendment is expected to pass. It even has Mississippi Democrats, including the Attorney General, Jim Hood, backing it.

The reason I'm posting this here is because I made a meager donation to the Jackson Women's Health Organization this morning, and I received a personal email back hours later - on a Sunday - thanking me and noting that I'm one of the first "outside" people to contribute.

So if you sometimes pass on political action because you figure that enough other people will do something to make a difference, make an exception on this one. My RSS reader is near silent on this amendment. I only found out about it through a feminist blog. The mainstream media is not reporting on it.

If there is ever a time to donate or send a letter in protest, this would be it.

What to do?

- Read up on it. Wake Up, Mississippi is the home of the grassroots effort to fight this amendment. Daily Kos also has a thorough story on it.

- If you can afford it, you can donate at the site's link.

- You can contact the Democratic National Committee to see why more of our representatives aren't speaking out against this.

- Like this Facebook page to help spread awareness.

can't stop the memes

remisims forces me to do these.

Read more...Collapse )


cats² and more memes

number of cats i have: 4
number of cats i'm allowed: 2
number of cats staying: 3
number of cats management knows about: 0

Read more...Collapse )everytime i start bitching about all these cats, i remember that they're house broken and shut up. i'd rather have them destroy the furniture than pee everywhere. swheat scoop is the greatest thing ever.

what's in my bag (in great detail). stolen from remisims

my bag that i got from target for $8 or $10 on the last day of the luella sale. it was originally $36.

i made the mistake of washing it and the bright red lining ran.

-totally tangerine hand sanitizer: my cheap ass got the kids' version because it was 2 cents cheaper than the original.
-mailbox keys
-combined poketo mountain keychain combined with sephora's tokidoki skullburger that was a ripoff. the paint's chipped and the rhinestones fell out. has my house and car keys.
-keyless loop with my flashdrive and keychains from seaworld, key west, the bahamas, cayman islands, 2 from nyc and a stuffed pig that came with my socks. also has my grocery cards. originally had my old housekeys on it.
-34 yr. old wordsearch stolen from md.
-purple sandy cheeks wallet that i'm probably too old for.
-orange pig pop notebook
-therapist appointment card
-psychiatrist card given to me by a group member
-2 halls breezers. chewing gum dries out my throat and these are the only things that help.
-extra sweet tropical gum
-2 gas x pills just in case my depression induced indigestion pops up.
-phone: free blue pantech impact that i dropped in baking so i had to tape the door on. looks worse than it actually is.
-sally hansen apricot cuticle cream
-cvs leaf: if you bring your own bag, you get a $1 coupon on every 4th visit.
-arizona state quarter from the philadelphia mint
-piece of orange calcite that my therapist gave me: i don't know how to use crystals yet.
-green rollerball pen. i got 3 for $1 at dollar tree. i'm so cheap.


sims meme


Aug. 1st, 2010

this past week was my 3rd week of classes and i've almost run out of gas. i go m-w and i've missed 2 weeks of tuesday, one of latin on wednesday and i have to find a way to drag myself to baking on monday.  this damn school is raising tuition (it's for profit; what did i honestly expect?) and while i can't afford to retake this stuff, i don't have the energy to give it my all like most of my classmates do.  it starts getting weird and tangled up here because i'm not sure if the extreme laziness is because i'm depressed or because i'm really lazy and good for nothing but using depression to absolve myself from responsibility. i wish i felt the way i felt because that's how i felt without there potentially being some underlying motive that makes me question the hell out of every emotion.  i can't really function anymore.  i'm so exhausted. i need a job, but i cannot work like this or keep pushing on like this for the rest of my life until i die.

i made an appointment to see a counselor at the women's center for thursday.  i'm afraid they'll tell me i'm too far gone to help and i'll have to see someone i can't afford. i'm terrified of getting a bad counselor. we'll see.

garden update- september 17

i am very angry at myself for not leaving my little moon and stars watermelon alone and picking it a couple of minutes ago. it wasn't ripe and i knew it! it was only beginning to turn pink in the middle and the stem was still green. grrr x 1000 and into the trash it gets flung. at least i can get the vine out of the way now.
thanks to my apathy, the garden is a weedy mess and if it would stop raining every damn day, i'd get out there and do something about it. the sunflowers are finished and need to be pulled. i got a new tomato after the first one died (pretty sure it was blight) and accidentally knocked the blossoms off of it. found some four o'clocks that i thought didn't sprout under the sprawling zinnias. i'll stake them to a broomstick, pull weeds and plan for my fall planting which is already too late in my eyes. i plan on putting out nasturtiums, lettuce, beets (only got them when stepfather was here because he likes them), mustard greens, spinach, carrots, scarlet runner beans and black hollyhocks. mine had lush foliage for a long time then just up and died in the summer.
i really need to kill the grass that's taken over the front and figure out what i want up there. some neighbors have really tall beautiful coleus and i think i may just do that. i want to try tulips and irises, but i'll have to spread my amaryllises out. i don't care about the front as much, so it all depends on what the garden centers have.


belief-o-matic results

the first time i took this, reform judaism was number 1.

1. Unitarian Universalism (100%)
2. Liberal Quakers (96%)
3. Reform Judaism (88%)
4. Secular Humanism (88%)
5. Neo-Pagan (84%)
6. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (83%)
7. New Age (74%)
8. Baha'i Faith (69%)
9. Mahayana Buddhism (69%)
10. Orthodox Quaker (68%)
11. Theravada Buddhism (66%)
12. Jainism (65%)
13. Islam (62%)
14. Orthodox Judaism (62%)
15. Nontheist (61%)
16. Sikhism (60%)
17. Taoism (56%)
18. Scientology (52%)
19. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (50%)
20. New Thought (50%)
21. Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (49%)
22. Hinduism (43%) 
23. Jehovah's Witness (35%) ha!! 
24. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (34%)
25. Seventh Day Adventist (30%)
26. Eastern Orthodox (29%)
27. Roman Catholic (29%)

take the test here.

reading list 2

this one is from the telegraph.